Silent "war"

I'm pondering relationship... How they start, how they proceed and how they end or continue. I mean, relationship between men and women mostly. Of course, the same things at some point happen between "just" friends, but it is not so intense as there is no such strong emotional tie with each other, even if it is just in one's imagination. So, imagine there is a woman and a man who like each other, but... Both of them are dissapointed in former relationship, and trying to protect themselves from one more failure they baricade themselves with politeness, business-type communication, casual invitations to "company" event, etc. Sometimes using other people who are too young to understand what's going on under the waters. This man and this woman, I think, are in a silent war of "who gets whom first." I wonder if there can be a winner in such a war, unless one side starts talking things out. In many cases, it requires decision to become vulnerable to the pain of potential rejection, though there is always a likelihood of victory. I wonder, if silence is golden in this case. Maybe it's more about the roles men and women play in starting and forming the relationship. I notice that in so many cases women fight for men more than men fight for women. In one book, I read that women are inviting and men are coming forward, they cross the bridge while women wait. My question is: what to do when both of them wait on their sides expecting the other to cross the bridge?...